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_posts/2023-01-14-musings-on-the-cinema.md
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layout: post
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title: Musings on the power of cinema
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- thoughts
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- journal
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---
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I've realised that going to the cinema makes me sad; a quiet, contemplative melancholy. Ennui. No matter the film, something about the cinema experience is meditative for me. I always look at things differently in the aftermath; like my perception is temporarily knocked off balance. No, more like a fog is lifted for a while. I especially enjoy that time immediately after, the cycle home. I notice so many little details, scenes of beauty and of strange nostalgia. Like I'm finally seeing the world how it is, or rather, I begin to see rather than look, listen rather than hear. I feel as though these moments, however brief, are when I am truly in touch with myself. My soul, my inner essence. This is why I love the cinema. These moments of private melancholy, of temporary clarity. It is a feeling I cannot replicate anywhere else in my life.
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_posts/2023-03-05-yuri-felsen-on-love.md
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title: Yuri Felsen on love
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---
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_"Like everyone, I have my own, maybe obsessive futile, maybe in some way authentic, vision: all of a sudden, I will imagine the entire homogenous world as it is revealed to us-the streets, the cities, the rooms, those intelligent beasts of a sad and predatory nature, who have learn to stand on their hind legs, who have built all this but are fated to disappear, who, despite this, still try to cling to something solid and lasting, still try to ward off the inevitability of death, who dreamt up fairy tales and, now that these stories have been disproved, are disconsolate - and for me the only means of defending myself from our terrible fate is love, my love - Lyolya. Without love we fall into a stupor or despair, it covers our naked animal essence; with the fear of death, with deliberate attempts to grab hold of some kind of eternity, one that is at once a mystery to us and yet devised by us, even the remains of love, even its very echo in music, imbues us with a semblance of fearlessness, dignity and the spiritual range to disregard death. Only by loving, by knowing about love, hoping for love, are we inspired and meaningfully engaged in life, able to banish the sovereignty of petty day-to-day cares, to stop waiting for the end to come"_
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**- Yuri Felsen (*trans. Bryan Karetnyk*)**
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From 'Deceit', first published in 1930 and translated to English in 2022.
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<h1 style="font-weight: 500;">
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Musings on the power of cinema
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</h1>
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<p style="font-family:Rubik Mono One;">
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14 Jan 2023 |
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<span style="background-color:limegreen;color:black;">thoughts</span>
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<p>I’ve realised that going to the cinema makes me sad; a quiet, contemplative melancholy. Ennui. No matter the film, something about the cinema experience is meditative for me. I always look at things differently in the aftermath; like my perception is temporarily knocked off balance. No, more like a fog is lifted for a while. I especially enjoy that time immediately after, the cycle home. I notice so many little details, scenes of beauty and of strange nostalgia. Like I’m finally seeing the world how it is, or rather, I begin to see rather than look, listen rather than hear. I feel as though these moments, however brief, are when I am truly in touch with myself. My soul, my inner essence. This is why I love the cinema. These moments of private melancholy, of temporary clarity. It is a feeling I cannot replicate anywhere else in my life.</p>
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_site/2023/03/05/yuri-felsen-on-love.html
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Yuri Felsen on love
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<p style="font-family:Rubik Mono One;">
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05 Mar 2023 |
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<span style="background-color:fuchsia;color:black;">quotes</span>
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</p>
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<p><em>“Like everyone, I have my own, maybe obsessive futile, maybe in some way authentic, vision: all of a sudden, I will imagine the entire homogenous world as it is revealed to us-the streets, the cities, the rooms, those intelligent beasts of a sad and predatory nature, who have learn to stand on their hind legs, who have built all this but are fated to disappear, who, despite this, still try to cling to something solid and lasting, still try to ward off the inevitability of death, who dreamt up fairy tales and, now that these stories have been disproved, are disconsolate - and for me the only means of defending myself from our terrible fate is love, my love - Lyolya. Without love we fall into a stupor or despair, it covers our naked animal essence; with the fear of death, with deliberate attempts to grab hold of some kind of eternity, one that is at once a mystery to us and yet devised by us, even the remains of love, even its very echo in music, imbues us with a semblance of fearlessness, dignity and the spiritual range to disregard death. Only by loving, by knowing about love, hoping for love, are we inspired and meaningfully engaged in life, able to banish the sovereignty of petty day-to-day cares, to stop waiting for the end to come”</em></p>
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<p><strong>- Yuri Felsen (<em>trans. Bryan Karetnyk</em>)</strong></p>
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<p>From ‘Deceit’, first published in 1930 and translated to English in 2022.</p>
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integrity="sha384-w76AqPfDkMBDXo30jS1Sgez6pr3x5MlQ1ZAGC+nuZB+EYdgRZgiwxhTBTkF7CXvN"
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05 Mar 2023 |
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<span style="background-color:fuchsia;color:black;">quotes</span>
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<h4><a href="/2023/03/05/yuri-felsen-on-love.html">Yuri Felsen on love</a></h4>
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“Like everyone, I have my own, maybe obsessive futile, maybe in some way authentic, vision: all of a sudden, I will imagine the entire homogenous world as it is revealed...
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<h4><a href="/2023/03/01/nextcloud-php-errors.html">Fixing php errors in a Nextcloud docker-compose configuration</a></h4>
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<p>I was trying to rescan the files in my Nextcloud server (running on Raspberry Pi 4 with DietPi), and kept running into some weird <code class="language-plaintext highlighter-rouge">php</code> errors.</p>
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I was trying to rescan the files in my Nextcloud server (running on Raspberry Pi 4 with DietPi), and kept running into some weird php errors. First error - “could...
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14 Jan 2023 |
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<span style="background-color:limegreen;color:black;">thoughts</span>
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<span style="background-color:darkgreen;color:white;">journal</span>
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</div>
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<h4><a href="/2023/01/14/musings-on-the-cinema.html">Musings on the power of cinema</a></h4>
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I’ve realised that going to the cinema makes me sad; a quiet, contemplative melancholy. Ennui. No matter the film, something about the cinema experience is meditative for me. I always...
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<br>
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<br>
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</li>
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</ul>
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